What is acceptance? What does it entail? In human psychology it means a person’s assent to the reality of a situation. Recognising a process or situation without attempting to change it or protest it, thus it causes less suffering than struggling vainly against it. Another angle to look at acceptance involves the word ‘ask.’ When we ask, we expect some kind of acceptance for example: asking for forgiveness , we expect to be forgiven thus accepted in one’s life despite of past events. Asking to join an organisation or institution, we wait for acceptance. So acceptance also revolves around finding recognition whether in a family or community. At times people want to be accepted thus changing who they are in order to show a certain type of person they think is rightfully accepted in their community. However, I am saying why changing who you are so you can be accepted. Rather accept who you are and society will just have to accept you like that. I mean its really sad how young people tend to pretend to be what they are not so as to gain acceptance and recognition especially at college, high school even amongst a group of friends. Why would you want to put yourself through so much just to be recognised. We subconsciously ask to be accepted in life through success, marriage, nice houses etc. There is a sublimation drive from society which is the bottom line of most people’s actions towards being accepted in any way possible.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. ‘
Acceptance is the opposite of rejection. In my last blog, I tackled on the issue of rejection and I realised not so many people would want to be at the opposite side of the good things. Because some do not handle rejection well, they spend their entire lives trying to prove a point that you rejected me once but you shall eventually accept me type of thing. In the end we compromise our standards and principals in the name of acceptance. I have heard of girls or even guys going to lengths just to be accepted by the other, why not stop think a little and say ‘If this is who I am, what I have, what I have done, there are people out there who will accept me as I am. ‘
The first incidence in the bible that shows the issue of acceptance is in Genesis 4 v 7- 8
"If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his desire, and thou shalt rule over him. And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him." Can you see what the desire for acceptance led to, the first murder case in the bible. Cain was not satisfied with what he had to present before God, and he became jealous of his brother Abel and slew him.
Now ask yourself why do you want so much to be accepted? Is it because you are not satisfied with your looks? Are not satisfied with the what you currently posses in terms of wealth and property? Are you trying so hard to acquire all these things that it leads you to sin? It is not wrong to desire to look good or have wealth nor it is not wrong, but do not let it posses you so much until it leads you to sin all just to be accepted by society.
Another important thing with acceptance is the ability to take in and accept the things you cannot change. I’m not saying one should get over something but rather strive to minimise the significance of past events or what happened and how you are feeling about it. We can’t change death for instance, its something we have to accept that someone beloved to us is gone forever. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying we shouldn’t grieve, we should and then allow ourselves to accept that we can’t change death. Acceptance will bring healing and less suffering.
After all this has been said, it is a blessing to know that we are all accepted by God no matter how we look, what we have done through His mercy, grace and great love.
Romans 14 v 18, “For he that in these things serveth Christ is acceptable to God, and approved of men."
He forever accepts as long as we come to Him with our own free will.